four fried chickens & a coke...& some dry white toast

my sympathetic midwife sent me to the hospital on 2.14.98. that was the due date i'd been given, my blood pressure was dangerously high and i was clearly miserable. i beeped my girlfriend K who was my labor coach and called Trusted Ally.

we three arrived at the hospital around dinner time. i was hooked up to all of the monitors and we waited. i kept my thoughts on the fact that it would all be over soon, trying to keep the fear at bay. and we waited.

hospital staffers came and went. checked readings, checked fluids, checked me, checkmate. and we waited.

around 11pm, they sent me home. i wasn't going anywhere on my own, and the hospital was too busy with other maternity patients. "bedrest" i was commanded.

i sobbed in K's car on the way home. she came into my apartment and surveyed the small space. i changed into pajamas, still hiccuping.

"can i do anything for you? can i rub your back?" she inquired. K was a massage therapist by profession. there was some pleading on my part for the foot massage that would induce labor, but she wasn't buying into my craziness. but she allowed me to cry myself into utter tiredness until i could sleep.

she left, promising me that she'd call in the morning. the Kiddo, obviously uncomfortable, spent the night practicing his dance moves. i spent the night with my two favorite brothers, Jake & Elwood.

and we all waited.