The Great Pink Elephant Analogy

much like how The Great Dorito Analogy hit me like a ton of bricks, my boss tossed another one at me on Friday, while we were catching up on things.  sometimes it's really great working for a small business: we're more like family.  she knows about the Kiddo, about certain circumstances in my life that make living and breathing difficult.  and she's eternally supportive.  i'm ridiculously lucky in that regard, considering we just got through a very rough patch, and she could have made it unpleasant for me.

"i'm driving again!" i exclaimed.

she looked at me blankly, not comprehending.

"um, yeah. i haven't driven in months.  guess you didn't know that, huh?"

i went on to explain that i certainly wasn't going to verbalize, at the time, the things i wasn't doing.  it was one thing to know that they were watching me toboggan downhill, but to have them actually understand that i was withdrawing from life, well, that would have been TMI.

she cocked her head, shading her eyes from the sun.  "its like there's a huge pink elephant in the room, and everyone sees it.  you just think everything's pink, therefore normal."

well, raise my rent.

specifically when it comes to adoption, Chris is really the only person in my life who understands how difficult (and sometimes traumatic) participating in open adoption is for me.  if i'm sad or grumpy, and tell him that i'm "having a crappy adoption day" (not that there are "great adoption days", mind you), he understands exactly what that means.  and maybe i'll talk about it, maybe not.

but i haven't really talked it about in detail, specifics, in quite awhile.  compounded with the miscarriages, the pink elephant on my life doubled, tripled, quadrupled itself without me even noticing.  indeed, everything looked pink and "normal".

while the elephant hasn't diminished in size, i have a little perspective.  i can see the other colors in the room.